Iranian Leader Visits Tiny South Wales Snooker Tournament

The incredibly bored and drunk patrons at the Snot and Larvae Snooker and Water Polo emporium, got an unexpected visit from a well known head of state while waiting their turn at a tournament in Lillishite-on-Humperdink in the Welsh town of Tonypandy on the river Llanfairfechan.

The little known tournament, pairing the least qualified contestants from just down the road in county Clwyd, was on the European itinerary of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. The Iranian leader, who had ducked out of the United Nations conference on Racism in Geneva to "spend some quality time rubbing elbows with other Zionist Jew haters," was met with total indifference by the largely inebriated crowd.

When the confused head of state asked to throw out the first pitch, Snot and Larvae proprietor Myfanwy Amerawdwr clubbed the stunned president with a copy of masonry bound editions of The Gododdin and The Lament for Cynddylan - two tomes weighing over 14 stones apiece.